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<BR>> Why did Ah Beng go to a movie with his 18 friends?<BR>> Because below 18 not allowed Lah !<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Ah Beng wants to buy a TV set. He goes to a shop.<BR>> Ah Beng : "Do you have color TV ?"<BR>> Salesgirl : "Yes !"<BR>> Ah Beng : "Give me a green one, please "<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Ah Beng is filling up an application form for a job.<BR>> He supplied the information for the columns on Name, Age,<BR>> Address etc.<BR>> Then he comes to column on "Salary Expected", but he is not sure<BR>> of the question.<BR>> After much thought, he writes " Yes "<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Ah Beng goes to a store and sees a shiny object.<BR>> Ah Beng : "What is that shiny object ?"<BR>> Salesgirl : "That is a thermos flask."<BR>> Ah Beng : "What does it do ?"<BR>> Salesgirl : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"<BR>> Ah Beng : "I'll buy it"<BR>> The next day, Ah Beng goes to work with his thermo flask<BR>> Boss : "What is that shiny object ?"<BR>> Ah Beng : "It's a thermos flask."<BR>> Boss : "What does it do ?"<BR>> Ah Beng : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"<BR>> Boss : "What do you have in it !?"<BR>> Ah Beng : "Two cups of coffee and one cup of ice cream"<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> After taking photocopies of documents, Ah Beng always compares<BR>> it with the original for spelling mistakes.<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Ah Beng always smiles during lightning storms because he thinks<BR>> his picture is being taken.<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Why can't Ah Beng dial 911?<BR>> Because he can't find the number 11 (eleven) on the phone.<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it.<BR>> When he encountered some problems. He decide to use the 'Help'<BR>> command after some tries.<BR>> Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer<BR>> retailer for support.<BR>> Ah Beng : "I press the 'F1' key for help lah, but it's been<BR>> over half an hour and still nobody come and help me Lah ?!"<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Ah Beng with two red ears went to his doctor.<BR>> The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he<BR>> answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone ring, lah - but<BR>> instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it<BR>> to my ear, lah" "Oh dear !" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But ...<BR>> what happened to the other ear ?"<BR>> Ah Beng answered : "That stupid dumbo called back, lah !!!!"<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> Ah Beng talk to a long-distance telephone operator.<BR>> Ah Beng: "COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME THE TIME DIFFERENCE BETWEEN<BR>> Taipei<BR>> AND LAS VEGAS ?"<BR>> Operator: "JUST A MINUTE..."<BR>> Ah Beng : "THANK YOU , lah" AND PUTS DOWN THE PHONE.<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> After completing a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for<BR>> quite some time, Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a<BR>> friend.<BR>> "It took me ONLY 5 MONTHS TO DO IT", Ah Beng brags.<BR>> "FIVE MONTHS ? THAT'S TOO LONG", the friend exclaims.<BR>> "YOU ARE A FOOL." Ah Beng replies, "SEE THIS BOX, IT IS WRITTEN<BR>> FOR 4-7 YRS".<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ?-------<BR>><BR>> At a bar in New York, the man to Ah Beng's left tells the<BR>> bartender,<BR>> "JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE"<BR>> and his companion says, "JACK DANIELS, SINGLE".<BR>> The bartender approaches Ah Beng and asks, "AND YOU, SIR ?"<BR>> Ah Beng replies : "Tan Ah Beng, MARRIED lah"<BR>> -------? ? ? ? ? ? ?------- |
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