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发表于 20-2-2006 11:05:00|来自:福建厦门 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
<STRONG><U>Bring me the winner</U></STRONG>
<P>   -- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.</P>
<P>  -- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.</P>
<P>  -- Well, bring me the winner then.</P>
<P>  给我那个打赢的吧</P>
<P>  -- 服务员,</P>
<P>  这个龙虾只有一只爪。</P>
<P>  -- 对不起,先生,这只肯定打过架了。</P>
<P>  -- 哦, 那给我那个打赢的吧。</P>
发表于 20-2-2006 11:06:00|来自:福建厦门 | 显示全部楼层
小狮租房
<STRONG><U>The mean man's party.</U></STRONG>
<P>  The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."</P>
<P>  "Why use my elbow and foot?"</P>
<P>  "Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?"</P>
<P>  吝啬鬼请客</P>
<P>  一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:“你上到五楼,找中间那个门,然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后,再用你的脚把门推开。”</P>
<P>  “为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”</P>
<P>  “你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪,你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。</P>
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发表于 20-2-2006 11:07:00|来自:福建厦门 | 显示全部楼层
<P>  <U><STRONG>Advice for "Kid"</STRONG></U></P>
<P>  A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement community. Everybody else is n their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,"Get the kid."</P>
<P><BR>  忠告“年轻者”</P>
<P>  这里想对将要退休者提一点忠告。如果你只有65岁的话,</P>
<P>  千万别进退休社区。因为那里人人都七八十岁或者八九十岁了。每当要搬东西,抬东西或者装东西时,他们就叫喊,“让小的干吧。”</P>
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发表于 20-2-2006 11:12:00|来自:福建厦门 | 显示全部楼层
<STRONG><U>Which woman?</U></STRONG>
<P>  One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall.</P>
<P>  On my return, I noticed that how dusty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit.When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the <BR> most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."</P>
<P>  My husband looked up and said, "Mom's here?"</P>
<P>  哪一位女人?</P>
<P>  一天晚上我开着丈夫的车去购物,</P>
<P>  回来后发现车身沾满灰尘,于是擦洗了一阵。当我终于走进屋里时大声喊:“世界上最爱你的女人刚擦洗了你的车灯和挡风玻璃。”</P>
<P>  我丈夫抬头看了看,说:“妈妈来了?”</P>
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发表于 20-2-2006 22:56:00|来自:福建厦门 | 显示全部楼层
支持
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发表于 21-2-2006 08:11:00|来自:福建厦门 | 显示全部楼层
thank you for your support.[em04]
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